He woke me before dawn and it was very cold. Then he surprised me by giving me a hot drink before I had to leave my sleeping-furs, that warmed me enough that I could get into more clothes by the fire and try to think.
"What are we taking with us?".
"We’ll have to have quite a big pack each. It’s a long way and we’ll be exposed to the wind up there so we must have an emergency shelter and more food than just today’s. Your pack is a good strong one, but I’ll take most of the weight. You’ve got thin little arms and legs, you’d better not carry much."
"I’m stronger than I look."
"Yes, I expect you are. And a bear’s tooth to help you."
We had honey and seeds for breakfast, it was good and I felt more cheerful at once. My pack only contained some food, extra furs, tinder fungus and a piece of white quartz to give to Vezeru. I had seen Ikaseraz pack a hand axe or would have taken my rather smaller one. My dagger went into its holder on my belt.
The sun was coming up as we closed up our shelter and started off. The going was easy along the river and we were quite hot with walking and the sun getting higher. Where we stopped to eat there were even a few midges. But it got tougher after that. I found the climbing hard and Ikaseraz did too though he tried not to show it. It got colder as it got rockier and we stopped to rest and put more clothing on. I was glad of my lemming fur hood as the wind got stronger.
The figure of Vezeru startled me, I thought he was looking at me and could see what I was thinking. I quickly opened my pack and laid my quartz gift at his feet. Ikaseraz called me to him.
"Come and sit here a while. I need to rest before honouring Vezeru."
It was sheltered where he sat and the sun warmed us.
"How can I tell whether he accepted my offering?"
"This time next year you will not make that mistake. It is with not thinking things through. Vezeru is "she" not "he". Now tell me why you should have known."
He sat patiently and my first thoughts were of him. I thought that he was quite nice really and not the scary old man we children had thought him to be. Then I thought about his question and wondered if I knew much about the world at all.
"This is the source of the river, this river is called Vezer. So Vezeru is the origin of the river, this spring here. Mother Earth is giving us water from her body, so the spirit of the spring must belong to Mother Earth so she is a "she"."
"You said that well. Who told you about those things?"
"Father. He always said I was ignorant of the world and tried to make me learn."
"Good, I shall do the same."
A dragonfly flew up to us and looked at my face. Then it flew over and settled on Vezeru’s foot and bobbed there a few times before flying up and looking into Vezeru’s eyes. It flew off and we didn’t see it again.
Ikaseraz wanted me to interpret the incident but it was beyond me. He didn’t seem displeased to have to explain it himself.
"The dragonfly is a strong flyer, of the sky, so a messenger from Sky Father."
"Oh, of course."
"Yes, you could have thought of that." I nodded.
" The message is always harder though, it may be more than one. This is your first day as my apprentice so it must be about that. The messenger looked at you, then went to greet Vezeru. It is very good news Kizkur. Sky Father is saying that you will be a good enchanter for the group. He has told Earth Mother your real name and said that they will together bless you with power. But what sort of power? That is left open for different interpretations. I would like to think that it is the obvious one, that Sky Father controls the weather and will help you with that. There are other things it could be, the big eyes of the dragonfly could make you a far-seer, or the strong flying could mean an interpreter of dreams. We cannot know. I will do everything I can to make you a weather-monger. Neither Sky Father nor Earth Mother has sent an omen against that and it is the group’s greatest need. I only wish I knew more about weather-spirits."
"Your spirit-guide will help you Ikaseraz."
"Yes she will. I cannot tell you about my spirit-guide yet, though I would like to. Only enchanters can know about each other’s spirit-guides. As soon as you are initiated I will tell you all about her. But now I must dance for Vezeru."
He got various power-objects from his pack and put some around his neck while holding others in his hands. He struggled a bit to get up but I knew better than to help him. The effort made is part of the offering, I had learnt.
The figure of Vezeru was surrounded by a ring of reindeer antlers. It was not a circle which surprised me, but I knew that I would find out why at some point. My awe at Ikaseraz’s knowledge gave me complete faith in his teaching. Outside the ring he performed his dance. The previous dances I had seen him do had always been accompanied by his drum. I wondered if the things in his hands perhaps represented his drum in places he was not able to bring it to. Low notes that he intoned were in the same rhythm as his steps. It seemed to go on for a long time and my thoughts strayed to when I would be dancing for the spirits. I hoped I would have a better shaped figure by then, they wouldn’t think much of my stick-like arms and legs. After my initiation I could make myself a drum, that would help to convince them that I was a real enchanter. But I must start to think about being a weather-monger. I could think of nothing except that the sound of a drum would probably be most unsuitable as it seemed to me to imitate thunder and it was storms that I would be trying to prevent.
Ikaseraz’s dance was getting slower and it had not been very energetic at the beginning. Dancing at all with his painful hips would doubtless please Vezeru. He stopped soon after and we went and sat by the spring for him to have a drink.
I saw a movement in the reeds beside the water and a spider came from her hiding place and sat on one of the rocks by the spring. I can picture her now in my mind.
"Look at this beautiful yellow spider. It just came out of the reeds and sat there in the open like that."
"It’s a relief to get a sign after all that dancing. Tell me what the sign means, think it through."
It took me a while and I was doubtful.
"The spider has no wings, it crawls on the earth so it is a messenger from Earth Mother which has come in answer to your dance to Vezeru."
"That’s the easy part. Now what is the message?"
It took me even longer and then I had to admit I could think of nothing.
"It was a trick question, I don’t know either. Let’s watch and see if she does anything," We were disappointed in that, all she did was to turn round and go back into the reeds.
"Can you see anything different about that rock? I can’t" he said.
"It’s darker than the others."
"But that is probably just to make sure we saw the yellow of the spider by contrast. Perhaps the colour is significant though. It must be a blessing on your apprenticeship, that is what I danced for. What do you associate with yellow?"
"The sun."
"No…the sun is a servant of Sky Father. She would not be referring to him. It must be something produced by the earth."
"Ochre. Is she saying I should paint in the yellow rather than the red? I’ve always liked red ochre best."
"I do too. Anything else?"
"There are yellow lichens that I use in dyeing, and some of the plants have yellow flowers. Or do you mean that the dye from it is yellow?"
"Could be either. We’ll try the yellow plants first, what do you use?"
"The yellow lichen you know the one, and dandelions are yellow they give a lovely magenta. The best blue comes from elecampane which has yellow flowers."
"The best feverfew is brewed from elecampane too, and it is good…were you making blue dye the day you saw the mountain?"
"No, purple, but I had put elecampane in when the result was too red."
"Were you adding elecampane just before you saw the mountain?"
"I don’t know. It’s all jumbled up. I think I probably was."
"That will be the explanation. Not of what the spider was telling us. Why you should suddenly enter the spirit-world for no reason that I could see. Elecampane helps some people into the spirit-world, you are probably one of them. Good, we’ll try that when you’re more prepared."
"But what could the spider have been telling us about elecampane?"
"I can’t think of anything. So let’s try plants which give yellow dyes, which are they?"
"To get a good yellow…mmm…sundew, but that’s a bit harsh, bog myrtle gives a nice soft yellow or the roots of bracken if you want it a bit pinkish."
"You can throw bog myrtle on the fire to clear your head, but - no - we’re not really getting anywhere. Let’s start back, something may occur to me on the way home."
It was easier walking downhill of course but we went more slowly, Ikaseraz was tired. When we had stopped and were resting on a rock he looked at me as if he were trying to estimate my weight. "Not very heavy." I thought.
"Being an enchanter opens up a wonderful life. Adding the spirit-world to your experience is something so enriching I can hardly imagine now any other way to live. But there are drawbacks as well. You are probably too young yet to have realised that most good things come with bad ones attached. Though it can work the other way too. Bad things may have unforeseen good consequences."
"What drawbacks?"
"Being an enchanter takes up all your time. You will not be able to have children. Or rather you will not be able to raise them. In two or three years the time for your initiation will come. After that you may have a baby, but you would not have the time and energy to look after it. We would have to give it to a couple who had no children. Do you understand, you would probably feel badly about giving it over to someone else?"
I tried to think how Mother would have felt giving the baby away. She would not have done it. But she knew the baby. If I had a baby it would be a stranger, perhaps that would be alright.
"If I was giving away a stranger I think that would not be too hard. But the baby would need my milk for quite a while and then I would get to know it. If it was not a stranger I think it would be hard. What do you think?"
"I think that something could be arranged so you could give it to its new parents when it was still a stranger to you. There is no need to worry about it yet, but I thought that you should tell me if you would rather be a mother than an enchanter."
"I would rather be an enchanter."
"That’s agreed then."
We went on in silence for a while and he seemed to be walking more vigorously.
"Perhaps the spider’s colour was nothing to do with it. It could be the fact that it was a spider that signifies. Have you heard of Misumena?"
"Yes, Father told us about all the protective spirits. She is the Spider Spirit in charge of trapping. She lures prey into our traps."
"Your father has taught you well. It could be as simple as that. You had better check our traps if we are home before dark. The spirits can be deliberately obscure, you will soon find that out. The message they send may be of absolute importance for the survival of our group or it may just be a personal joke, or anything in between."
"What does �deliberately obscure’ mean?"
"Hiding your meaning for some reason that you do not give."
We were not home before dark, so the traps were left. Ikaseraz said we must add Misumena and Anaxa, the spirit of the dragonflies, to our evening reverencing to see if either would send us a dream about the spirit messages.